Amy's List of Annoying Things (Part 1 of 37)

Since returning to the states, I've been keeping a running list in my head of things that annoy me - not for any particular reason, only because I have trouble letting go. Forgive my Louis Black-ness, but here are a few of the things on my hit list:

(1) The ubiquitous barcoded card you must have to get the sale price at stores. What happened to our right to privacy? Isn't that in the constitution somewhere? Now stores have the right to deny you their sale price unless you fork over your personal information, which they in turn use to target advertising and very likely sell so they can make up the difference on their lost profit. Why aren't people up in arms about this? If we sacrifice our freedoms on this front, the next thing you know the government will usurp the right to record our phone calls! ...What? They already did? That brings me to number 2.

(2) NSA wire-tapping. We all put up with the increased security at airports - removing our shoes in line for the X-ray machine; looking the other way when the dark-skinned man gets pulled from the queue for a full cavity search; even sitting through Homeland Security's video on international flights into the U.S. The captive audience watches while DHS describes just how they're going to "enhance the nation's security while facilitating legitimate travel and trade through our borders". Now they're going to log my calls? I've been sending SMS's to Kenya, a country with a large Al Qaeda presence. Does that make me a terrorist? I want the nation to protect me, but not at the expense of my privacy. Again, it's in the constitution. And we would be naive to think that this information wouldn't be abused in some cases. Anyone remember a senator named Joe McCarthy? Or how about Richard Nixon and his famous enemies list? OK, next.

(3) Captive audiences. This one has been a bug up my butt for many years, starting when the local movie theaters began playing ads along with previews. This was in addition to the still advertising slideshow on display before the previews began. Now, no matter where I go, I am forced to watch happy people driving their luxury car through sand, happy people drinking soda, or (in the scariest of cases in South Africa) happy people learning a new dance from a weasel-like creature. Meanwhile, the cost of the movie itself has sky-rocketed. If they're going to force commercials on us, then the savings should be passed onto the consumer, the way it used to be in the days before cable television. Don't even get me started on that.

(4) Bureaucracy for the sake of bureaucracy. My friend Allison is applying for culinary school in the fall. Having already obtained her master's degree a number of years ago, she was a bit surprised by the requirement of the culinary institute - that she provide a copy of her high school transcripts to them. It seems the institute needs them for "accreditation purposes". So, 13 years after the fact, Allison was forced to contact her high school in Texas to get the transcripts. Just one problem. They were destroyed in a flood several years ago, and somehow never got converted to microfiche. Now she is dealing with the painful process of getting a signed letter from the Texas Department of Education stating the problem so she can be accepted into her new school. Why? She has college transcripts from two institutions, and she could not have attended those schools without finishing high school. Besides, I want the name of the person who is actually going to open up the transcripts, review them, and put a check mark next to Allison's name. I wonder how much he/she gets paid. And can I have that job? This lead me to Number 5.

(5) Unemployment. That's a joke. Being unemployed is annoying me, yes, but since it's my fault I can't complain.

(6) Insurance deductibles. After 6 months of payments to CorpsCare and excellent health, I just went to the doctor last week. That's when I discovered that I would be paying every penny for the appointment and prescriptions out of pocket, because the insurance company has a $250 deductible every year before they actually start covering you. I'm told this is standard with insurance companies now. Um, I thought the point of that $155/month check to them was to obtain COVERAGE. Even in the healthiest of years, I'm likely to spend $250 between the annual physical, allergy medications, and occasional adverse reactions to poison ivy or mangoes. But I'm not likely to spend much more than $250. So thanks for nothing.

(7) Fax machines - what's the point? We have the web now. There are better ways of transmitting information, without me having to drive through 40 traffic lights to get to Kinko's. Just an observation.

OK, I'm done bitching. I'm off to visit my mom this weekend and give a talk on Kenya at her preschool. I'm sure I'll have stories when I return.